Have you ever thought about the qualities you admire in other people?
It is often said that what we see in others is a reflection of ourselves. But how can this be true if we see someone disciplined and persistent, but still we struggle to get out of bed at the same time every day?
Although this may seem like a contradiction at first glance, the qualities that you recognize in others but think you don’t have are just there in you without action, waiting to be activated.
We constantly choose how we manifest ourselves in the world and interact with others.
Most people move through life unaware of the unconscious choices they make every moment. It is these unnoticed decisions that prevent them from embodying the qualities they admire in others.
If you are so used to pressing the snooze button on your alarm clock every morning, you are bringing laziness to your character, not discipline.
If you are always angry when someone stops you on the motorway, you choose the qualities of anger and resentment rather than compassion.
Pay attention to some of the qualities you notice in people you respect and admire. Rather, these qualities are the universal expression of good character, and we should all make an effort to develop these qualities in ourselves and Express them in our lives.
1. Integrity
It says a lot about a person when they make a plan and execute it. What he said, what he is going to do, fosters a sense of honesty and trust, confidence that his word can be trusted.
We’ve all met people who like to talk but don’t. Their ego hinders them by making them say things that make them look good in front of others. In fact, they cannot support their claims with evidence of their actions.
Although this person may not consider himself dishonest, this is exactly the quality that he embodies. Most importantly, they are dishonest towards themselves.
If you encounter someone who behaves like this more than once, stay away.
2. Curiosity
A genuine curiosity about other people and the world around you attracts new experiences into your life. When you are on the train or in the subway on your way to work, you are surrounded by hundreds of your fellow men.
They all have their own unique stories and experiences that can offer you new insight and wisdom. But what are you doing? You sit in silence, distracting yourself from the suburban bustle with your smartphone, book or newspaper.
One of the prerequisites for developing a deeper sense of curiosity is a willingness to let go of your fear of being judged. Most of us live in fear, consciously or unconsciously, that others will judge us harshly if we say or do something unusual.
To really follow your sense of curiosity, you must be able to influence it, even when it’s inconvenient. On your next trip, start a conversation with the person next to you.
It doesn’t have to be anything awesome. Comment on the weather, complain about the trip to work — everything that makes you start a conversation is fine. There is nothing to be afraid of, most likely, if you really do not succeed, you will never see this person again. But what if, perhaps, he had great wisdom or deep experience that he could share with you?
When you go for a walk, if you see someone walking by in a t-shirt with a logo or phrase that attracts your attention and arouses your curiosity, it’s perfectly normal to turn to them and ask about it.
The reality is that you are not hurting anyone. In fact, the magic of curiosity lies in unexpected personal connections that you create, or in new places that you discover by choosing unusual things. This experience would not have been possible if you had not decided to embody this powerful quality.
3. Gratitude
The worldwide epidemic of depression stems primarily from a lack of recognition of the value of your life at every present moment and a lack of gratitude for your entire life. This is why the quality of gratitude is so important in order to live a happy life and become a better person.
The moment you start taking things like food, shelter, and clothing for granted, you develop a sense of entitlement and amnesia about what’s really important in life.
You start taking things and yourself too seriously, letting life’s challenges knock you out of the game. Then, when everything falls apart, the lack of gratitude makes you believe that your life is empty and useless.
Gratitude not only helps you focus your attention on all the amazing people, things, and experiences in your life, but it also has a scientifically measurable impact on your psychology and physiology.
Sincere gratitude can change your state of mind and restore your connection to the magic of life.
“You will not be the same person two months after you consciously thank each day for the abundance that exists in your life. And you will put into effect an ancient spiritual law: the more you have and are grateful for, the more you will be given.”
– Sarah Pan Breatnach
4. Compassion
His Holiness the Dalai Lama wrote in the Essence of the heart Sutra:
“According to Buddhism, compassion is an aspiration, a state of mind, a desire for others to be free from suffering. This is not passive — it is not just empathy, but rather empathic altruism that actively seeks to free others from suffering. True compassion must have wisdom and love.
That is, we need to understand the nature of the suffering from which we want to free others (this is wisdom), and we need to feel a deep closeness and empathy for other sentient beings (this is loving kindness).”
The Dalai Lama says that compassion is a quality that is inextricably linked to wisdom. You can’t have one without the other. Have you ever held the door open for someone and then got angry when they walked past you without thanking you?
All relationships, especially close ones, require honesty as a solid Foundation. If you start lying or hiding the truth, you will end up destroying the openness and trust that you have already developed or tried to build.
Broken trust is very difficult to fix. What good is an intimate relationship if you can’t share absolutely everything with this person? How can someone recognize the” real ” you if you keep hiding something?
At first, being honest 100% of the time can be difficult. You may be afraid of being judged or rejected if you find that you need to share something that could threaten your relationship with a friend or partner.
Ultimately, you can’t control their reaction. If someone can’t handle the truth, or it causes a cycle of negativity, just have compassion for them, because it’s their own conditioning that causes this unpleasant reaction.
6. Bravery
It takes courage to step outside your comfort zone and overcome your fears. You know it’s going to be scary, but you still do it.
The great thing about bravery is that it increases over time. When you begin to apply this quality in your life consistently, you will begin to gain more confidence in yourself, because you know that no matter what the task, you will always do it from the best side.
You know that you have the courage to act in spite of your fears. Of course, from time to time fear creeps in, but with enough courage you can move forward, no matter what.
“I learned that courage is not the absence of fear, but the victory over it. A brave man is not one who is not afraid, but one who overcomes this fear.”
– Nelson Mandela
All of the above qualities are absolutely necessary in order to live better and be a good person on this planet. Many of these qualities have been revered for millennia in traditions such as Buddhism and ancient philosophy, and for good reason.
When you stop thinking about how you Express yourself and act in the world, it is important to analyze the qualities that you Express. Through this process, you will discover areas that require more attention.
As you move through life, try to find ways in which you can act more honestly and be more honest, compassionate, brave, grateful, and curious.
“Gratitude reveals the fullness of life. Turns what we have in ourselves, and much more. This turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity. It can turn a meal into a celebration, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.”
– Melody Beatty
